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JIM'S BIG EGO: unpop for the unpopulous!

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JIM'S BIG EGO OUTSOURCES EXECUTIVE JOBS OVERSEAS

JIM039S BIG EGO OUTSOURCES EXECUTIVE JOBS OVERSEAS
When asked why BIGEGO Enterprises, a privately held company, would choose to outsource executives instead of their lower paying work force, Jim Infantino replied:

"When we looked at the numbers, it was a no brainer. I mean, our average upper level executive earns like 5,000 times that of our average worker - god knows how THOSE poor bastards survive. So - it just made so much more sense to replace our executives rather than their underlings. I mean - if you shop around overseas, you can get a really really smart chap to do the job of your basic high-level executive for like 20K a year! I can't even tell you how much that saves us. As for the average workers, the savings is just not as great. We would rather keep them here where we can keep an eye on them."

Jason Schneider, co-founder of BIGEGO Enterprises added:

"You guys have really missed the big story on this one - over 3 months ago, when Jimbo and I were going over the numbers with the Bobs, we made the first move that made this recent reshuffle totally obvious. We were looking at the cost-effectiveness of our middle management people and discovered that THOSE people were doing SHIZZLE-UNO for our company! We shipped THOSE jobs to f**king Pluto."

When asked whether this might start a dangerous trend, further draining jobs in an already perilous job market, Schneider said:

"Who cares? Hey Jimbo, let's go hit some strip clubs."

updated: 11 years ago